Top 19 Things To Do To Maintain Your Insanity

[Alan From NYC]

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds"

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."

8. Don t use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance , Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

[Lnzbug]

[GINA]

Loved it!!

[joannieboats]

I totally just paged myself at work....! I'm in hysterics! How about this one: Next time you're in a crowded public place (like the mall or supermarket), yell out "Nana!" and see how many grandmother-esque people turn around. This is hilarious. Just try it. Seriously.

[Maggadog]

I was in a drive through lane one time and was actually asked if I wanted my order "to go"

I said, "no, I'll stay here in my car and eat it here."

[Toad]

#20: hang out with MEE!!!!!!! BWUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

[PhoenixRising]

21: Every now and then, when you go into a fast food place, you say, 'Welcome to McDonald's (or whatever place it is); may I take your order?'



(I actually do that one, from time to time. Usually they look at you for a second, and then are all confused...)

[Alan From NYC]

Originally Posted by joannieboats

.. Next time you're in a crowded public place (like the mall or supermarket), yell out "Nana!" and see how many grandmother-esque people turn around. This is hilarious. Just try it. Seriously.

Of course, there is the classic, yelling, "Hey, Stupid!" And when almost everyone has stopped, follow up with, "Yeah! You! No! You!"