Groaners

[jdesigns]

1. The roundest knight at king Arthur's round table was
Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned
out to be an optical Aleutian .

3. She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it
was a weapon of math disruption.

5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in
his work.

6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum
Blownapart.

9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are
looking into it.

12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said
to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'

14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass'.

16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When
his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change
yet.'

17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

18. It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't
have the balls to do it.

19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small
medium at large.

20. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a
seasoned veteran.

21. A backward poet writes inverse.

22. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your
count that votes.

23. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

24. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects.

[PhoenixRising]

groan...

[antonym]

thanx

[wawalker]

What do Osama and Obama have in common?

They both hung out with people who bombed the Pentagon.

[antonym]

Originally Posted by wawalker

What do Osama and Obama have in common?

They both hung out with people who bombed the Pentagon.

LOL

Then it seems the only way to stop Obama from bombing the Pentagon is to put him in there..... lol


Good job!!

[jdesigns]

Originally Posted by wawalker

What do Osama and Obama have in common?

They both hung out with people who bombed the Pentagon.

The only groaner is this got posted here instead of the politics forum!

[chiltepin]

Yep, and yours were a lot funnier.